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Hilary T. Smith
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Bryan Peterson

Lies Beneath

Lies Beneath - Anne Greenwood Brown There comes a day in a reviewer’s life when s/he must write a review to the tune of an ELO song. My friends, that day has come. (Or more accurately, for some reason, this song kept popping into my head every time I read this book. I can’t explain it).Thus, I give you: “Evil Woman Merman” as a placeholder until closer to the book’s release and a "proper" review. Here, you can sing along with my..er.. slightly altered lyrics cough. "You made a pawn of me, but this plotting revenge has got to end.Hey Calder, you got the blues, cos' you ain't got no need to own shoes.There's an open ocean that leads nowhere, but it’s time to put miles between here and there.There's a hole in your head where your sisters’ voices come in,They took your past and played to win,Ha Ha merman it's a crying shame,But now you gotta kill the person you blameCHORUSE-evil Merman, E-evil Merman, E-evil Merman, Evil MermanRolled in to your old lake,Turned on the charm, went creepin’ around,But a fool and his ego soon go separate ways,And you found a poet girl lyin' in a daze,Ha Ha Merman what you gonna do,You want to destroy the plans your sisters gave you,It's so strange that you're feeling pain,But your siren sisters want you back on board their crazy train.E-evil Merman, E-evil Merman, E-evil Merman, Evil MermanE-evil Merman, E-evil Merman, E-evil Merman, Evil MermanEvil merman you’ve done her wrong,And now you're tryin' to wail a different song,Ha Ha funny how you say you’re in love, she read you a poem and you can’t give her up,She came runnin' every time you spied,Thought she saw love smilin' in your eyes,Ha Ha very nice to know, but now it’s time for you to swim off and go..E-evil Merman, E-evil Merman, E-evil Merman, Evil Merman"Also: Darren Criss as a mermaid! Albeit without the signature black curly locks, though he is wearing the Calder-esque Ray Bans. [Image from tumblr]